Talk VS Slander

Something that i have been thinking a lot about lately is GOSSIP.

We all know that the word gossip is a negative connotation for speaking poorly

of someone. Actually, the word gossip has an ulterior definition, "light talk", but

the kind of gossiping i am speaking of is the word's recognized definition,

"malicious chatter".

Everyone gossips sinfully or not, it's inevitable, but once the enemy has a foothold on us through it,

it's hard to define the usually distinct line between talking down on someone and talking

to someone about someone else for righteous reasons. The righteous reason either being

for expressing concern or asking for advice on how to handle that person and their treatment to you.

When you are discussing a person to a friend in a concerned way, there should not be anything belittling

about that conversation or that will turn into malicious gossip. Remember, it's so easy to turn to

a friend rather than turning to God first. If someone is really bothering you, pray FIRST for that

person and how you treat that person in response. 

"Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need" Matthew 6:33

If you absolutely need to talk about it with someone, make sure your motives are not to uplift yourself or tear down that offensive person. Sometimes, we just need to vent to a best friend, but i think venting to more than one person about someone else turns into sin. 

You have more than one best friend you like to vent to? That is not wise. Keep

it to one or two MAXimum. Also, make sure the best friend you are venting to isn't one who eats

up information for useless reasons. Make sure he or she has the same motives as you do when

speaking to them.

It is also wise to talk to a pastor or Christian parent about the situation if you need further guidance. 

He or she has been there, and although it may seem more difficult to relate to an adult over a best friend, the adult is the one who is more likely to give that five star advice.

If a friend or frenemy, whatever, is attacking you or putting you down, why not politely confront them?

It is likely that he or she is oblivious to his or her actions and may even feel bad. DO NOT, and i repeat, DO NOT TEXT THEM OR SEND OUT A FACEBOOK MESSAGE when confronting, that's immature. Make it face to face or telephone if it is long distance. Not talking to one's face is cowardly, text messaging serious things is pathetic... let's grow up!
When in response to your confrontation that person doesn't care or doesn't change, stay away from them. Be polite, but don't ignite a fire for friendship, that is misleading. 

Do not pretend to be friends with someone that you just don't want to be friends with, that's lying. Wear kindness and loyalty around your neck, but be honest.

"“If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back" Matthew 18:15

*There is more to that verse that continues in 18:16-17, but verse 15 contains step 1. 

I have observed that a lot of Christians think that because they're, well, Christians that [wrongly] gossiping in their case is "different". We've all have fallen into that trap.

You may have one idea that you're talking to someone in the right way, just to vent or get prayer or advice, but the enemy can quickly turn that into sin, piece by piece. Satan usually works with

small portions at a time so you don't even know when you're falling. Always be on guard by staying in constant prayer! As Christians we are to be the example of Christ. We need to express His love in our lives

by acting as He calls us to act- more like Him! The second we start the fall we should be on our knees in prayer. 

When struggling with gossip, i like to read James 3 Click and check it out (: