Be Evident

                                  "Let your gentleness be evident to all."

Philippians 4:5

Sometimes my human nature takes delight in putting people in their place. I don't exactly know why, but when appropriate I am guilty of handing out serious reality checks when others are out of line. When my bluntness is not done out of love and respect, this is not godly character at all.

I just finished an excellent book called “Unglued: Making Wise Choices in the Midst of Raw Emotions” by Lysa TerKeurst. The title speaks for itself, but Lysa wrote a lot of biblical truths that will forever remain treasures for my soul. 

While reading Lysa’s book, I felt as if I was reading Philippians 4:5 for the first time when she referenced it. Gentleness was such a fresh concept that never made sense in the past. Suddenly, I understood 1 Peter 3:4, "You should be known for the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God." Honestly, I'd sit in church, a woman's bible study, my bed for devotional time, or a young girl's small group, and I'd read this verse and think, "Okay, beautiful on the inside means focused on Christ, but what is this quiet spirit stuff?" That's not meant to be natural, darlin'. 

For someone who delights in justice, there are times that my backbone can show when it's unnecessary. In these times my backbone doesn't look like a backbone at all- it can often look like a stick up my rear. Have you ever been in those conversations with your friends when you're both like, "I wish I would've slapped her so I can say I've slapped someone"? Oh.. Is that just me? Well, now that the truth is out.... 

Needless to say, I prefer to make it clear to people that taking advantage of me is the poorest choice to be made. I also enjoy opportunities when my friends need a little support when others are out of line. Yes, there are times that standing up for others is appropriate. There are times when protecting yourself is very necessary too. But I think that sometimes we ought to stop and think, "Is this a wise reaction?"

Bitter people are such a drag, but that's not new news. The reality is that there are a lot of empty people in this world who are dealing with a lot of hardships. Some of those empty people are always looking for fights. I mean if fighting is how you want to spend your free time, please leave me out of it. But when some people choose not to, it can be so hard to refrain from fighting back. There was a recent time that someone said a snide remark to me, and oh how I wanted my sarcasm to flow out and show them a little look into their own behavior. However, for the first time in a long time, I heard God say, "Wait, and let your gentleness be evident to all." Even to her. Even to him. 

I know that the flesh tempts us to prove our strength in ways that are more hurtful to others than protective of ourselves. Or maybe there are situations when we just try to defend a belief we have and the conversation escalates into an argument. I'm going to guess that 8 times out of 10, self-defense isn't as necessary as gentleness. No matter the front we see on others, everyone struggles on the inside and has insecurities. Why should I make it worse for others whom are experiencing rough times of their own?

If we made our common goal as we walk through this life to be gentle, this world would be changed. Now to be honest, gentleness doesn't come over night. One of the fruits of the Spirit is gentleness, and as we are emotional and ever-changing humans we need a never-changing God to help us out. 

If we saw people through eyes of understanding instead of judgment, we would be showing them that we have a gentle and accepting spirit. No matter if we agree with a person or not, everyone needs love in that way. Friendships should be encouraging, honoring, and loving. In that case, I've decided that I would like to make everyone my friend if possible.