Kiddos

“And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me. But if you cause one of these little ones who trusts in me to fall into sin, it would be better for you to have a large millstone tied around your neck and be drowned in the depths of the sea." Matthew 18:5-6

Almost every weekday i babysit for a family in Fishers from 3:45-6pm, and i love it. This is a drastic change to how i would've felt about watching a child in the previous few years. I always thought most children were cute, innocent things, i always had the desire to have my own someday, and i always fell in love with close friends' and family members' babies, but thinking of children in general used to... annoy me and sometimes disgust me. Hence, the reason i never went to Camp Allendale at my church unless i were to be directly asked to help.
Now, my perspective has completely changed, and looking back i know just when that transition started happening. In November 2009, one of my best friends' parents adopted 3 beautiful Colombian kids into their family. Watching the kids change, my best friend Eden change, and the family grow in a different way was very inspirational. Seeing those kids go from a hard life in Colombia.. to having full tummies and a loving family. To hear them singing in church and lifting their hands, and saying "Glory to God" over and over again to the tune of Steve Fee's song, really moved me.
I never wanted to adopt.. had no desire to welcome strangers into my home and family.. but now i hope God blesses me with such an opportunity.

Although the kids i babysit can get a little... crazy (sometimes) i still love them. This new job is a ministry, and i pray that God will use me to reach out to them. They need Jesus so much. There mom is very sweet, and she seems to be involved with a church a little bit, but i think it's very hard for her to go because she is a single mother and pharmacist who needs more time with the kids. Something i struggle with is not crossing the line between Babysitter and Mom. The minute i tell the boy to do something he doesn't like... he gets out his cellphone and calls his mom. With the girls, one will either cry or obey... and the other will pretend not to hear me and obey if i get to raising my voice. Sometimes, this job takes a lot of patience, but these precious kids mean well.
 I need a lot of prayer for reaching out to them. If anyone has any suggestions- please share!
Right now, we're working on actually doing homework and not eating snacks past 5... hoping to soon get some chores in there too. What i would really like is to talk to these kids about God in a way that keeps them interested and open. I want to reach out to them. Hopefully, i can get the mom to take them to Camp Allendale.. maybe i can be a counselor? We will see where the Lord leads. Right now, prayers are so much appreciated!
If any mother is reading this and needs a babysitter.. talk to me. I officially love babysitting. (:

"I've used my lungs for everything but breathing", so pray.

"You have these problems because you need the gifts they carry within." -Anonymous

We all have our own issues and situations and often times feel that we can't push through them.
Sometimes these problems look over-bearing. The weight of them seems too big to take on anymore,
and we want to either give in to them.. or throw our very own pity-party and "try" to fix them eventually.

I feel like my personal problems seem too heavy when i lack time in the Word or when i make myself
so busy that my God time isn't as big of a priority as it should be.

There are times that my faith in what God can do is limitless.. and then when i'm blah, i start questioning
things and worrying about things that will never be in my control.

When everything in me is aligned with the Lord... when i daily cry out for my desires to match His, for the fruits of the Spirit, and for humility i stop worrying and i TRUST Him so much more. I pray more for others... even those that can sometimes get on my nerves or are rubbing me the wrong way.

When the enemy sees that i am just an inch away from falling... he will start tempting me and trying to get a toe hold of me.. so that he can eventually get my foot.. then my leg.. and then all of me... The enemy works in quiet, sneaky ways... a little bit at a time, so that before you know it, he has you. That's his trick. The farther you are from God, the more you don't realize the Spiritual attack.

This is what happens with me: For some reason, the enemy tries to use my perspective of people to get me.
When i'm lacking God time, satan will get one innocent person to get under my skin just a little bit. For awhile i will just ignore it and not really think much of it. The less time i have with God, the more that person will annoy me. Then, the enemy will get someone a little closer to me to annoy me, and i'll start getting a little bothered by them. Then he will get someone who has caused wounds in my past to stick out to me in a negative way constantly... which will bring past feelings and anger to push to awaken from the grave just a little bit.  Then, before i know it, i'm concerned about myself and my feelings. I'm not sure why the enemy uses people to try to get me to fall.. maybe because i'm a people person sometimes and an introvert the rest of the time.

On the other hand, when i'm close to God, as soon as someone annoys me i pray for them immediately because i feel like God has them stand out to me as a way to tell me they need prayer. And for that person or people that have caused me wounds who stick out, i'm praying for them a lot and asking God to change them.
I know someone who was confusing me and frustrating me for awhile about their life and relationship with God... then a few months later i hear they're going through something big and all i did was sit there questioning them and getting frustrated by them when i should've used the indications given that something weird was happening as a sign to pray for them. It doesn't hurt to pray.. it's worth the effort.


Without God we have no wisdom, so without God we don't know what's best for us and we don't see our own mistakes. That's so obvious, but sometimes being a Christian and referring that back to ourselves, we forget. We will never understand everything that happens or why things happen, but through it all God's promises remain.

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom Proverbs 9:10


"Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall" Psalms 55:22 

When i finally see myself being stupid and worldly, i just pray. Sometimes prayer is over-complicated. God can do anything, remember? I ask him to make me a better person in the areas that i am weak, and to change my thoughts so they don't dare become words or actions. We are not called to be perfect, but to strive to be more like Him.

*I feel like i already blogged about prayer.. but here it is again. Have Problems? Pray!

Talk VS Slander

Something that i have been thinking a lot about lately is GOSSIP.

We all know that the word gossip is a negative connotation for speaking poorly

of someone. Actually, the word gossip has an ulterior definition, "light talk", but

the kind of gossiping i am speaking of is the word's recognized definition,

"malicious chatter".

Everyone gossips sinfully or not, it's inevitable, but once the enemy has a foothold on us through it,

it's hard to define the usually distinct line between talking down on someone and talking

to someone about someone else for righteous reasons. The righteous reason either being

for expressing concern or asking for advice on how to handle that person and their treatment to you.

When you are discussing a person to a friend in a concerned way, there should not be anything belittling

about that conversation or that will turn into malicious gossip. Remember, it's so easy to turn to

a friend rather than turning to God first. If someone is really bothering you, pray FIRST for that

person and how you treat that person in response. 

"Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need" Matthew 6:33

If you absolutely need to talk about it with someone, make sure your motives are not to uplift yourself or tear down that offensive person. Sometimes, we just need to vent to a best friend, but i think venting to more than one person about someone else turns into sin. 

You have more than one best friend you like to vent to? That is not wise. Keep

it to one or two MAXimum. Also, make sure the best friend you are venting to isn't one who eats

up information for useless reasons. Make sure he or she has the same motives as you do when

speaking to them.

It is also wise to talk to a pastor or Christian parent about the situation if you need further guidance. 

He or she has been there, and although it may seem more difficult to relate to an adult over a best friend, the adult is the one who is more likely to give that five star advice.

If a friend or frenemy, whatever, is attacking you or putting you down, why not politely confront them?

It is likely that he or she is oblivious to his or her actions and may even feel bad. DO NOT, and i repeat, DO NOT TEXT THEM OR SEND OUT A FACEBOOK MESSAGE when confronting, that's immature. Make it face to face or telephone if it is long distance. Not talking to one's face is cowardly, text messaging serious things is pathetic... let's grow up!
When in response to your confrontation that person doesn't care or doesn't change, stay away from them. Be polite, but don't ignite a fire for friendship, that is misleading. 

Do not pretend to be friends with someone that you just don't want to be friends with, that's lying. Wear kindness and loyalty around your neck, but be honest.

"“If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back" Matthew 18:15

*There is more to that verse that continues in 18:16-17, but verse 15 contains step 1. 

I have observed that a lot of Christians think that because they're, well, Christians that [wrongly] gossiping in their case is "different". We've all have fallen into that trap.

You may have one idea that you're talking to someone in the right way, just to vent or get prayer or advice, but the enemy can quickly turn that into sin, piece by piece. Satan usually works with

small portions at a time so you don't even know when you're falling. Always be on guard by staying in constant prayer! As Christians we are to be the example of Christ. We need to express His love in our lives

by acting as He calls us to act- more like Him! The second we start the fall we should be on our knees in prayer. 

When struggling with gossip, i like to read James 3 Click and check it out (:

She's "not all there".. or here

There’s so much I miss. Yet so much I don’t want to revisit.

Life’s not perfect.. at all. Not everything goes right. Nevermind, everything goes right. Just not the way i want. “No regrets”, whatever, sure.

 I have lived a very blessed and somewhat exciting life (to me anyways). At the same time, I have so much life coming at me. Hitting me in the face... in a good way. So much to look forward to.

So much excitement.. so much curiosity and mystery. I want my life to unwrap. I want to know what happens.

Everyone can relate. If not now, one day you'll see that when love is in your life, you wouldn’t even return to the past for a single pleasant thing that’s happened. Nothing worldly seems as important.You just love that person and your shared story thus far. You're blown away and very thankful.

Love makes you not care. You are so focused on the now and on the future. You just want more , more, more of it. You want all you can take. Kind of like a tic tac, one is never minty or satisfying enough.
So i want more life but want to remember less life at the same time? How does that make any sense?

What i think happens is that being just on the borderline aka right on top of the question mark of life, i’m not yet in for what’s next and not yet out of childhood completely.. i run to the past to remember and then run back to the future to dream.

Maybe that’s just a good definition of high school, and college too even, I don’t know. Sometimes it’s so hard to stay in the now. Trust is key. Trusting is not one of my strong points. Trusting God is… trusting people isn’t. If you are a control freak and you have the same problem… it’s because you’re a control freak, and that’s all there is to it.

But, like me, there comes a time when you just need to let go of high expectations and just live. When you live.. you love and are loved.

If you’re always looking forward to something or looking back on something.. you’re missing the something that’s happening now, what a waste! In reality, when God is at the center of your life there’s nothing to worry about. That's the love story worth creating.

“Don’t long for the `good ole days,’ this is not wise. Enjoy prosperity while you can, but when hard times strike, realize that both come from God. Remember that nothing is certain in life”. Ecclesiastes 7:10,14

Wake Me Up When September Begins

Last month at CIY my challenge card was to lead a devotion with my family once a week, pray that God will move in my family, and to start with the book of Mark.
When i first opened my card i was in awe of God's perfection. My family definitely needed something like this. We've tried family bible studies in years past, but it was always hard to get everyone together with all of the activities we were all involved in, so we gave up countless times.
Now we're on week 4 and it's been great!
We started with Mark... i kind of changed up the rules and went through a summary of Mark instead of analyzing it closely (not sure if that's cheating lol). Then we talked about our favorite verses from that book.
Now we're on to one of my favorite books from the bible, Ecclesiastes, and we're doing about 2 chapters a night. Satan gets me to feel so un-motivated every stinkin' week, but that just inspires me to push harder.
In the end, God makes me more thankful for my family. Thanks to everyone who has been praying!

School started a few weeks ago. Ever since then I've lost track of time. If every week is as fast as last week was we're in trouble.
I love my classes, which is kind of nerdy, but that's what keeps my day going. I have a day that's solely math and math-like classes alone, and i am so thankful to be able to focus on one subject in a day.

Thursday is small group orientation at my church and i'm so pumped for another year of growing with some lovely girls.
I have been biking and running everyday, and now i'm addicted. (: Our basement is slowly becoming a gym.
I am still getting the hang of balancing devotions, homework, work, college class, working out, friends, and church activities, but it's good prep for next year.

PS) I'm itchin' for some Fall weather. This summer weather heat is exhausting.

My Health/Fitness Observations

1. Water needs to be a priority. Don't drink anything more than water in a day. Try to make milk come in 2nd. So many times i crave a sugary beverage.. before giving in, drink water and see how you feel. usually the craving goes away for me.

2. Fast food? I see so many people make a bad habit of eating out constantly! My family eats out 1-2 times a month OR LESS. Save your money and your body.

3. Eat slowly! Give your comsumptions time to settle in your stomach. Then you will be least likely to go for a second helping.

4. Don't allow yourself to indulge in any junk food until you've had some type of fruit or veggie. it's great self-discipline.

5. When you take a break from working out for more than one day.. it instantly becomes a chore. Keep focused and push forward.

6. Pilates balls are excellent ab-workers. I love mine to keep my stomach toned. I just lay on my back and basically go back into a bridge (like in gymnastics) then slowly move up. It feels great and is more effective than sit ups!

7. When your brain tells you that you're hungry.. stay out of the kitchen for 15 minutes and engage in a distracting activity (excluding the TV because of food commercials), and your stomach should calm down. Try to listen to the depths of your stomach.. like the difference between love and infatuation.. know the difference between hunger and cravings.

8. Make dessert more of a treat than a habit. Make dessert a reward for a hard workout or a day of total healthy eating. Give yourself something to work for.

9. Put junk food in hard to reach areas.. when you eat sweets take small tidbits and put the bag or box in a complicated place.. in that way when you're done you can decide if it's worth it to get up again and walk all the way over for round 2.

10. Have you heard the supposed myth that a little chocolate a day is good for you? I'm not sure how
accurate that is, but i tell myself it's true. Like exercise, chocolate causes endorphins.. if i'm convinced
that i'm following the rules by eating a little chocolate a day i'm gonna be happy and motivated by that alone!

11. Never, ever compare yourself to someone else. First of all, we're all made to be uniquely who we are.
Looking at a fit person and wanting that look could easily cause jealousy. We're not all meant to look the same. It's not wrong to have a goal of what you want to look like, but comparing yourself is ungodly. Plus,
someone's always going to look better than you in your eyes no matter who you are (tough love).

12. Most importantly, remember what God thinks, "Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit; therefore, glorify God with your body." (1 Corinthians 6:19)
That does not only mean by what you wear or how you behave but what you eat and how you treat God's work of art! "It’s not good to eat too much honey, and it’s not good to seek honors for yourself." (Proverbs 25:27) I feel like that verse applies to how selfish going out to eat several times a month can become. We're running out our money to satisfy ourselves with unhealthy food. Let's face it, owning money can easily become so self-centered, we buy things that we think will make us happy. Why not cut out something
that gives temporary happiness and long-lasting FAT.
"So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." (1 Corinthians 10:31)
Like i said, fastfood kills your body and eats up your money. We need to work our hardest to keep our
bodies healthy. I believe that the Lord will bless us for it!

Short & to the point.

I am a female, a woman, a lady.

And i believe that a lady's job is to not pursue, but to be pursued.

To be honest, to be lovely, to be respectful AND respected, to be lively, to be godly, to be faithful, to be pure, and to be encouraging.

I love being a girly-girl. I love pink, lace, pearls, red roses, and love.

I love feeling pretty, I love being adored, and I love being a girl. I have a higher, much deeper opinion on this matter, but for now all i want to say is that above. the end.